ImaJAN Media Network
MeltedJoystick Home
   Games  Members
Search +
Searching... Close  
Are you sure you want to delete this comment?
  Login Using Facebook

Backlog: The Embiggening - November, 2014

View Nelson Schneider's Profile

By Nelson Schneider - 11/01/14 at 03:11 PM CT

Welcome to another look into the near future. It’s November! Now that Halloween is in the rear-view mirror, capitalists have no other impediments in their quest to flood the market with the Crap the Came for Christmas. Thanksgiving? What’s that? In America, we’re not thankful for anything… except dupes to whom to sell shovelware!

Shovelware? Yes, there is a bit of it this mont… OH MY GOD IT’S OVERWHELMING!

It seems that some of the shovelware manufacturers – specifically Disney – have started reducing the pellet count in their shotgun blast releases in order to specifically target the vital organs of those most susceptible to buying such crappy licensed garbage. Thus the new “Penguins of Madagascar,” and “Planes: Fire & Rescue” are only targeting Nintendo platforms (what with Nintendo’s unshakable ‘kiddie’ reputation). Likewise, both Disney and 4Kids are bringing their new “Big Hero 6” and “Winx Club” games exclusively to Nintendo handhelds… yes, BOTH the DS and 3DS. Yet other shovelware makers have replaced the shot in their shells with slugs, gracing the 3DS ONLY with a new “Hello Kitty Racing” title and a new “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” title.

Other shovelware makers are still perfectly happy to spread their filth willy-nilly. Thus every platform conceivable is getting “LEGO Batman 3.” The ‘more legitimate’ consoles are also getting a new “Adventure Time” game and a new “Digimon” game (Really? Is the “Digimon” anime even getting new episodes anymore?). Ubisoft, being the ultimate hive of scum and villainy that they are, is specifically targeting 8th Gen consoles with “Rabbids Invasion” and “Monopoly: Family Fun Pack.”

In the realm of sport-related shovelware, November is only really looking up for soccer and motocross fans. Whether these poor souls fantasize about kicking balls or telling people how to kick balls, they’re covered. I have no idea what makes “Moto GP 14” different from “MXGP: The Official Motocross Videogame,” but I DO know that any videogame with the word ‘videogame’ in the title is guaranteed to be a vile experience. Of course, there is also a fresh set of ports of last month’s newest annual“WWE” game for the 8th Gen consoles, but ports are ports…

Speaking of ports, the number of them coming this month is nearly as despair-inducing as the amount of shovelware. “Minecraft” is coming to the XBONE and Vita (in a disgusting display of skipping the WiiU for two even bigger joke devices), Sony is porting… err… ‘remastering’ “Akiba’s Strip” for the PS4, “Tropico 5” is coming to the Xbox 360, ALL OF TEH “HALOEZ” are coming to the XBONE, “Watch Dogs” is coming to WiiU, “The Walking Dead: Season Two” is coming to Vita, and the 3DS is getting both “Tetris” and remakes of “Pokemon Ruby & Sapphire.” At the same time, “The Wolf Among Us,” “Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor,” “Grand Theft Auto 5,” and “Rocksmith 2014” are migrating to various new platforms.

With all of the guaranteed crap and ports flowing in November, it’s surprising that there’s any room for legitimate releases. However, there are quite a few multi-platform games coming up that look great… provided you like generic shooter sequels or Ubisoft’s attempt at the Stealth genre. The newest ‘Call of Duty’ entry will be dropping in November, with surprisingly little fanfare (Dare I hope that the entire online-multiplayer-generic-military-shooter craze is petering out?!); along with “FarCry 4,” which apparently features Hipster Gordon Ramsay as the villain; and a third-person take on the ‘Dead Island’ franchise. Ubisoft apparently wants all of its bases covered with ‘Assassin’s Creed,’ as the 8th Gen platforms (and PC) are getting “Assassin’s Creed: Unity,” while the old 7th Gen platforms (minus the Wii) are getting “Assassin’s Creed: Rogue.” Those title choices almost make it seem like a ham-fisted attempt at fostering hostility between the two hardware generations. Despite all that mediocrity and crap, one bright spot in November’s releases is the third ‘Dragon Age’ game, “Dragon Age: Inquisition.” Of course, the brightness of this spot is up for debate. ‘Dragon Age’ has been a half-baked franchise at best, an example of what happens to great developers (like Bioware once was) when EA buys them at worst.

What about exclusives? Well, things are looking… interesting in November, to say the least. PC is getting a new simulator, this time featuring construction as its theme… and that’s it. Sony, on the other hand, will be gracing the PS3 and PS4 with “LittleBigPlanet 3,” and disgracing the PS3 and Vita with a new ‘Hatsune Miku’ diva game. Microsoft is still failing hard with a single Kinect exclusive (by Ubisoft, no less) – “Shape Up” – to show for the month. Nintendo is looking a bit brighter than it has in a while. The WiiU is finally getting the REAL 8th Gen ‘Smash Bros.’ game (for which the 3DS version serves as a complement), Sega is bringing a new multiplayer take on ‘Sonic’ to both the WiiU and 3Ds with “Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric” and “Sonic Boom: Shattered Crystal,” and a Metroid-vania inspired sequel to the Game Boy Color’s slutty genie franchise is coming to WiiUWare as “Shantae and the Pirate’s Curse.” The 3DS is also getting a new ‘Harvest Moon’ game and a new ‘Persona’ game, proving once again that, yes, there are RPGs on handhelds, but, no, they are not good.

I kind of feel like I want to give “Dragon Age: Inquisition” a shot, but I will not buy any EA games on PC because of Origin, and my overwhelming disappointment with the series up to this point has me gunshy. I will definitely be picking up the PS3 version of “LittleBigPlanet 3,” and grabbing the WiiU takes on ‘Smash Bros.’ and ‘Sonic Boom’ for some local multiplayer. If “Shantae and the Pirate’s Curse” stays WiiUWare exclusive, I might be forced to buy my first non-DLC from the Wii Shop, but with the way digital releases go, there is still plenty of time for it to hit Steam down the road.

Backlog Embiggened: +4

MeltedJoystick Gaming Blog RSS Feed

Avoid spam Captcha: Sign Up + or Log In +   

View Chris's Profile


Wrote on11/07/14 at 07:57 PM CT

Any game that let's me ultimately kill Hipster Gordon Ramsay is a win in my book. Plus, you get to ride an elephant (and kill things with it). Far Cry 4 winz teh internet cats! Or some such thing the cool kids are saying these days.

Write on Profile +


Previous Blog Posts


All Posts

April 2021

March 2021

February 2021

January 2021

December 2020

November 2020

October 2020

September 2020

August 2020

July 2020

June 2020

May 2020

April 2020

March 2020

February 2020

January 2020

December 2019

November 2019

October 2019

September 2019

August 2019

July 2019

June 2019

May 2019

April 2019

March 2019

February 2019

January 2019

December 2018

November 2018

October 2018

September 2018

August 2018

July 2018

June 2018

May 2018

April 2018

March 2018

February 2018

January 2018

December 2017

November 2017

October 2017

September 2017

August 2017

July 2017

June 2017

May 2017

April 2017

March 2017

February 2017

January 2017

December 2016

November 2016

October 2016

September 2016

August 2016

July 2016

June 2016

May 2016

April 2016

March 2016

February 2016

January 2016

December 2015

November 2015

October 2015

September 2015

August 2015

July 2015

June 2015

May 2015

April 2015

March 2015

February 2015

January 2015

December 2014

November 2014

October 2014

September 2014

August 2014

July 2014

June 2014

May 2014

April 2014

March 2014

February 2014

January 2014

December 2013

November 2013

October 2013

September 2013

August 2013

July 2013

June 2013

May 2013

April 2013

March 2013

February 2013

January 2013

December 2012

November 2012

October 2012

September 2012

August 2012

July 2012

June 2012

May 2012

April 2012

March 2012

February 2012

January 2012

December 2011

November 2011

October 2011

September 2011

August 2011

July 2011

June 2011

May 2011

April 2011

March 2011

February 2011

Log In
For members wanting to use FB to login, click here
remember me

What Members Are Doing

Comments about...

New Game Reviews

The Deep Paths: Labyrinth ... game review by Nelson Schneider
The Vagrant game review by Nelson Schneider
Avadon: The Black Fortress game review by Nelson Schneider
Strange Brigade game review by Chris Kavan
Satellite Reign game review by Chris Kavan
Watch Dogs 2 game review by Chris Kavan
Soldner-X 2: Final Prototy... game review by Hurain
Dead Cells game review by dbarry_22

New Game Lists

Top Super Nintendo (SNES) Gam... by Jonzor
Backlog by Nelson Schneider
Games I Own: Switch by dbarry_22
Top Game List by SIngli6
Top PlayStation 4 Games by Megadrive
Top Game List by Barmak
My Backlog by Chris Kavan
Games I Want To Play by Shaneo99




Contact Us Public Relations MeltedJoystick Friends    

Advertise and Business

Contacts Us


About us



Support Us

FAQ and Help

News and Press

Terms of Use


Are you sure you want to delete this comment?
Are you sure you want to delete this blog?